


No Idea

by Peachesuvucream



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Angst, Bill Cipher - Freeform, BillDip, Depressing, Dipper Pines - Freeform, Fluff, It's gonna be kinda sad, M/M, Memories, Sad, based off of a song, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-04
Updated: 2016-03-04
Packaged: 2018-05-24 14:55:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6157267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peachesuvucream/pseuds/Peachesuvucream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bill remembers when Dipper used to love him. He remembers Dipper. Where is he? Who is the boy who looks like Dipper but isn't? Bill had no idea. </p><p> </p><p>Based off of the song, Curly Cue by Melanie Martinez (sort of)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Bill missed Dipper. He missed the huge hugs Dipper used to give him, almost as if he hadn't hugged him in eternity. He missed Dipper's rants that caused his voice to get high and his eyebrows to furrow. He missed Dipper's kisses that he used to plant all over Bill's face, causing Bill's face to emit a red glow.

Bill missed Dipper. He missed Dipper's calm, relaxing words that would help Bill when he had an attack or when he just wasn't feeling good. He missed running his hands through wild, curly brown hair that always smelled of sandal wood. He missed when Dipper's voice would actually hold genuine love whenever he talked to Bill. He missed his 'I love you's that were always out of the blue. 

Bill missed Dipper. He missed him so much. Even though they were so close, they've never been so far apart. 

Whenever Bill just wanted Dipper to hold him or to just talk nonsense to him, Dipper would always reply with a monotone, "leave me be".

Bill missed Dipper. Not the boy who sat at his desk, getting sick of Bill's presence, but the old, loving Dipper. The geek Bill fell in love with.

Bill missed holding Dipper's hands, ones that seemed to be made perfectly for Bill's. Bill missed the half-hearted jokes they used to share when they were laying down, delirious and sleep deprived. He missed when they used to sit on the roof with piles of blankets and stare at the stars, just enjoying each others presence until the sun would peak over the mountains.

Bill missed Dipper. He missed him so much. Every day seemed to drag on forever with the boy sitting on his desk. Bill missed the Dipper who would never get bored of him. He missed the boy who would spend all day at Bill's side. The days went by so pleasantly fast. He missed him so dearly. 

Bill hated listening to this new Dipper, talk only when spoken to. Only show emotion when he read something funny or if he was with Mabel. This Dipper was sick and bored of Bill. Bill had not idea why. Why. Why. Why. Bill had no idea why.

Bill watched the boy sit on his bed, legs crossed, reading a book his college friend had suggested. Bill watched the boy's lips quirk at the ends, barely, not a true smile, but Bill's heart still skipped a few beats at the sight of the boy's smile. He missed him. He missed him so much.

Bill felt his heart squeeze, a lump creating in his thought as his eyes filled with tears. When did Bill _not_ cry. He looked away from the boy who refused to make eye contact with him, focusing on the carpet.

What did he do? What did he do wrong? Why wasn't Dipper... _Dipper_? Bill had no idea why. Why. Why. Why. Bill had no idea why.

Bill stood from his place on the floor and grabbed a blanket from the other bed, Mabel's old bed. Bill's new bed. The bed he hated so much with all his heart because he couldn't be with the boy he loved with all his heart. He hates that bed so dearly.

Bill grabbed a book Mabel had made both Bill and Dipper. A memory book. Bill's heart clenched at the cover. A picture of Bill in Dipper's arms, both of them smiling like idiots at a ice cream shop. Bill's hands were placed on Dipper's cheeks. Dipper's hands were wrapped around Bill's waist protectively. Dipper's cheeks were tinted pink and his face showed _emotion_. It was Bill's favorite emotion. Love. Bill missed Dipper, oh he missed him so much. 

Bill let a tear roll down his cheek as he made his way to the latch that lead up to the roof. He was so tired. He hated this new guy. He hated him so much. This boy who looked like Dipper but looked so much different at the same time. He hated his stupid stoic face and his stupid lifeless eyes. He hated how when they touched, the boy would jerk away from Bill like he was made out of fire. He hated how he never made eye contact and he never talked. He hated him so much. 

Bill made himself comfortable on the roof, looking up at the sky. There was hardly a cloud in the sky. The sun was slipping behind the mountains, the mountains he had watched so many times before. The sky was a burnt orange shade with splotches of magenta. Dipper would love the sky. At least the old Dipper would have. 

Bill opened up the memory book, bracing himself for unwanted tears. Crying was healthy. Crying helped him fall asleep at night. He was always so exhausted after crying. He missed being rocked to sleep by Dipper. He missed the feeling of his arms around him, touching him, feeling him, making sure he was real. Oh god.

Bill touched a picture of Dipper and him gingerly. They were making cookies. Bill wanted them with frosting and sprinkles but Dipper had told him those are for cupcakes. Bill didn't care and Dipper didn't either. Bill was sitting on the counter with Dipper standing between his legs. They both had grins on their faces and frosting in their hair. Bill wanted to prank Dipper and Mabel was on board. She ended up running away when Dipper got out the frosting because 'it takes forever to get out of your hair'. Bill was perfectly fine with that.

He admired the picture some more, taking in all the details. Oh he missed Dipper. A sob escaped his lips before he smothered his mouth with the blanket, laying down so that his back was rubbing uncomfortably against the rough texture of the roof. He let out a few more sobs before calming himself down. Dipper would be the one to always calm him down. He let out shaky breaths, his chest shuddering with every breath he took. He hated this feeling. He hated it so much. 

He flipped through more pages, so many memories being resurfaced. They felt like a huge slap to Bill's face. God he hated them. Go away. He hated them with all his heart, but they wouldn't go away. 

Once Bill couldn't take it anymore, he closed the book and drew his knees up to his chest, his arms wrapping around them gently. He was so fragile. So so fragile. He hated it.

He put his face in his knees and cried until he felt like passing out. Where was Dipper? Who was that boy sitting on the bed? What had Bill done wrong? Bill had no idea.


	2. Chapter 2

Bill missed Dipper. He missed the huge hugs Dipper used to give him, almost as if he hadn't hugged him in eternity. He missed Dipper's rants that caused his voice to get high and his eyebrows to furrow. He missed Dipper's kisses that he used to plant all over Bill's face, causing Bill's face to emit a red glow.

Bill missed Dipper. He missed Dipper's calm, relaxing words that would help Bill when he had an attack or when he just wasn't feeling good. He missed running his hands through wild, curly brown hair that always smelled of sandal wood. He missed when Dipper's voice would actually hold genuine love whenever he talked to Bill. He missed his 'I love you's that were always out of the blue. 

Bill missed Dipper. He missed him so much. Even though they were so close, they've never been so far apart. 

Whenever Bill just wanted Dipper to hold him or to just talk nonsense to him, Dipper would always reply with a monotone, "leave me be".

Bill missed Dipper. Not the boy who sat at his desk, getting sick of Bill's presence, but the old, loving Dipper. The geek Bill fell in love with.

Bill missed holding Dipper's hands, ones that seemed to be made perfectly for Bill's. Bill missed the half-hearted jokes they used to share when they were laying down, delirious and sleep deprived. He missed when they used to sit on the roof with piles of blankets and stare at the stars, just enjoying each others presence until the sun would peak over the mountains.

Bill missed Dipper. He missed him so much. Every day seemed to drag on forever with the boy sitting on his desk. Bill missed the Dipper who would never get bored of him. He missed the boy who would spend all day at Bill's side. The days went by so pleasantly fast. He missed him so dearly. 

Bill hated listening to this new Dipper, talk only when spoken to. Only show emotion when he read something funny or if he was with Mabel. This Dipper was sick and bored of Bill. Bill had not idea why. Why. Why. Why. Bill had no idea why.

Bill watched the boy sit on his bed, legs crossed, reading a book his college friend had suggested. Bill watched the boy's lips quirk at the ends, barely, not a true smile, but Bill's heart still skipped a few beats at the sight of the boy's smile. He missed him. He missed him so much.

Bill felt his heart squeeze, a lump creating in his throat as his eyes filled with tears. When did Bill _not_ cry. He looked away from the boy who refused to make eye contact with him, focusing on the carpet.

What did he do? What did he do wrong? Why wasn't Dipper... _Dipper_? Bill had no idea why. Why. Why. Why. Bill had no idea why.

Bill stood from his place on the floor and grabbed a blanket from the other bed, Mabel's old bed. Bill's new bed. The bed he hated so much with all his heart because he couldn't be with the boy he loved with all his heart. He hates that bed so dearly.

Bill grabbed a book Mabel had made both Bill and Dipper. A memory book. Bill's heart clenched at the cover. A picture of Bill in Dipper's arms, both of them smiling like idiots at an ice cream shop. Bill's hands were placed on Dipper's cheeks. Dipper's hands were wrapped around Bill's waist protectively. Dipper's cheeks were tinted pink and his face showed _emotion_. It was Bill's favorite emotion. Love. Bill missed Dipper, oh he missed him so much. 

Bill let a tear roll down his cheek as he made his way to the latch that lead up to the roof. He was so tired. He hated this new guy. He hated him so much. This boy who looked like Dipper but looked so much different at the same time. He hated his stupid stoic face and his stupid lifeless eyes. He hated how when they touched, the boy would jerk away from Bill like he was made out of fire. He hated how he never made eye contact and he never talked. He hated him so much. 

Bill made himself comfortable on the roof, looking up at the sky. There was hardly a cloud in the sky. The sun was slipping behind the mountains, the mountains he had watched so many times before. The sky was a burnt orange shade with splotches of magenta. Dipper would love the sky. At least the old Dipper would have. 

Bill opened up the memory book, bracing himself for unwanted tears. Crying was healthy. Crying helped him fall asleep at night. He was always so exhausted after crying. He missed being rocked to sleep by Dipper. He missed the feeling of his arms around him, touching him, feeling him, making sure he was real. Oh god.

Bill touched a picture of Dipper and him gingerly. They were making cookies. Bill wanted them with frosting and sprinkles but Dipper had told him those are for cupcakes. Bill didn't care and Dipper didn't either. Bill was sitting on the counter with Dipper standing between his legs. They both had grins on their faces and frosting in their hair. Bill wanted to prank Dipper and Mabel was on board. She ended up running away when Dipper got out the frosting because 'it takes forever to get out of your hair'. Bill was perfectly fine with that.

He admired the picture some more, taking in all the details. Oh he missed Dipper. A sob escaped his lips before he smothered his mouth with the blanket, laying down so that his back was rubbing uncomfortably against the rough texture of the roof. He let out a few more sobs before calming himself down. Dipper would be the one to always calm him down. He let out shaky breaths, his chest shuddering with every breath he took. He hated this feeling. He hated it so much. 

He flipped through more pages, so many memories being resurfaced. They felt like a huge slap to Bill's face. God he hated them. Go away. He hated them with all his heart, but they wouldn't go away. 

Once Bill couldn't take it anymore, he closed the book and drew his knees up to his chest, his arms wrapping around them gently. He was so fragile. So so fragile. He hated it.

He put his face in his knees and cried until he felt like passing out. Where was Dipper? Who was that boy sitting on the bed? What had Bill done wrong?His eyes suddenly felt very droopy. Tears still slipped down his cheeks but he didn't pay them any attention. He was used to the pain by now.

He felt himself dozing off before a memory resurfaced. He couldn't breath. Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. He couldn't breath. No matter how many breathes he took in, he felt like he was suffocating, like his lungs were collapsing, pumping molasses trough out his body. He felt heavy, so incredibly heavy that his body couldn't hold him up anymore. 

He collapsed backwards onto the roof, trying to breath. Oh god. He started crying again, sobbing quietly while trying to move and leave. He felt so vulnerable. He wanted Dipper. He couldn't have Dipper. Dipper was gone. Where was Dipper? Who was that boy sitting on the bed? What had Bill done wrong? Bill had no idea. 

He suddenly came back into the present as he heard movement around him. He heard crying, but his vision was still blurry, a reminder of the oxygen he was losing. He needs to breath. He needs Dipper. He needs to know what he had done wrong. 

He felt arms gently slide under his torso and cradle his head. They were so warm. So welcoming. His eyes slipped closed. Focus on breathing. Focus. Focus. Focus. It was really hard to focus with those warm arms hugging him. 

He blinked his eyes open, expecting to see anyone but the boy. The boy had tears in his eyes, streaming down his face, his bottom lip trembling. He was mumbling something over and over but Bill couldn't focus.

"-rry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Oh god, Bill, I'm so sorry. Fuck! Oh god. I-I'm sorry..."

Bill froze, was he talking to him? He said Bill. He said Bill. He _said_ Bill. Oh god. Was it Dipper. Was it the boy. He had no idea. His heart was hammering out of his chest. It hurt. It hurt so much. 

"Bill. Please say something. I'm so sorry. I'm so stupid. They, they threatened me and- and I actually listened. I'm- Bill, Bill, I'm so sorry babe..."

He just kept on talking. Bill stared at him dumbly. He was so confused. What the fuck. What's happening. Who threatened him. What. He slowly say up on his elbows, staring at the boy. 

"Dipper?"

The boy laughed and sobbed. Bill was enveloped in a warm, soft hug. Oh god. Was it Dipper. Was it the boy. Bill had no idea. Who. Who. Who. Bill had no idea.

"Y-yeah. It's me Bill. I'm so sorry please say something, I love you so much please say something Bill-"

Bill froze again. He said he loved him. Oh god it was Dipper. After three months with the imposter who claimed to be Dipper, it was. It was finally him. Bill jumped up, out of breath. He grabbed Dipper's face, kissing him hard on the lips. Oh god he missed those lips. They were so soft and welcoming. So warm and comforting. He kissed with all his past emotions, all his new emotions. He kissed Dipper until his lips were bruised pink. He kissed Dipper until he felt like passing out. He kissed Dipper. Dipper. Not the boy who claimed to be Dipper, the imposter who broke his heart over and over again. No. He kissed _Dipper_.

"I love you too, Dipper." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here's the happy-ish chapter. Hope you guys enjoyed. Leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed :)
> 
>  
> 
> Tumblr: peachesuvucream

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed, I'm gonna write the first chapter sad and the next chapter is going to be the same, just with a happy ending. SO THERES BOTH ENDINGS, SAD AND HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS!


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